I look forward to sharing and connecting with you there!

Don’t start that next chapter in your lives together with regrets!  With that thought in mind, in doing my usual perusal of the many wonderful wedding websites, I noticed a few of the same regrets listed by brides over and over on the discussion boards.  I’ve compiled those top wedding planning regrets below so that I can address how to avoid them.

Top 5 Wedding Planning Regrets

1) Not saving money for the big event sooner

2) Picking the wedding dress too quickly/early

3) Too many people & opinions involved in planning process

4) Too large a guest list – wishing they could un-invite people

5) Too large a bridal party

After 10 years of planning weddings (and having been a bride myself), I’m offering my expert advice that, if heeded, may reduce those wedding planning regrets.

Almost every bride & groom I’ve ever met underestimated the cost of the wedding they wanted.  Yes, weddings are expensive!  So, as soon as you and Mr. Right discuss getting married, start saving immediately — if you haven’t already.  Consider your savings goal and budget when choosing the wedding date.

Don’t let the initial engagement excitement rush you into choices you’ll regret.  Don’t  run around inviting every person you’ve ever known to your wedding.  When it gets down to the nitty gritty of cutting names from the guest list, it’s easier to cross off names if you haven’t already told them they can come.

Shop around.  Check out the numerous inspiration boards online, try on a lot of dresses, get samples of the invitations,  Once you think you’ve settled on the dress, invite, venue, etc., sleep on it.  Make sure that you’ll be happy with your decision.  And, after your decision is made, don’t look back.  All of those shoulda, woulda, couldas will drive you crazy.

Being barraged by unwanted opinions about how your wedding should go is inevitable. But that doesn’t mean you have to listen to all of them.  All parties who are contributing to the cost of the event should have some say in decisions but that doesn’t mean they get to run the show.  It’s best to discuss each person’s role BEFORE beginning the planning process.  Compromise may be necessary to resolve some differences but the bride and groom should never have to bow to every demand that is made.  When trying to decide when to compromise or not, consider:  “How important is this aspect to me?” and “Will I regret this choice later?”  And for those with opinions who have no stake in the wedding, just smile and say “thank you for sharing.”

The more the merrier does not apply to bridal parties.  Yes, you want to include everyone in your special day but that doesn’t mean everyone has to be in the bridal party.  A large bridal party has a substantial affect on your budget.  You may have to cut money from important aspects because of floral & other bridal party expenses.  And, don’t expect everyone in the bridal party to actively participate in the planning process.  Some members will be excited to help and others will not have the time or inclination to participate beyond the wedding day.

In order to realize your expectations and limit your regrets, you must keep the wedding plans in perspective.  After all, your wedding is just the beginning!

As soon as most brides become engaged, if not before, they hop on the planning express at full-speed.  But, you must manage your efforts carefully or you’ll burn out halfway through the planning process.  Wedding planning is project management – plain & simple.  And the key to keeping your sanity when managing your wedding is organization.  And, as any professional planner will tell you, organization is all about the lists.  So pause, enjoy the moment and plan the process before you begin the actual planning.

The purpose of list making is to keep you organized and on track.   But don’t get so bogged down in making lists that it becomes a chore.  There are four essential lists that should be created before beginning the planning of any event: time line, planning checklist, budget & guest list.

The first task is creating your planning time line.  Give yourself a workable planning period.  The biggest mistake some brides make is thinking that a shorter engagement will be less stressful.  Wrong — the busiest parts of the planning process are the beginning and the end, with a lull in the middle that I call the recovery period.  With an abbreviated time frame, you cut out that middle.  And, you’re likely to need that time to recoup after the seemingly endless hours of research, appointments & decision-making.  Another important factor to consider when setting your time line are your other obligations: work, school, etc.  I recommend at least a 6-month planning period.  If you are considering a peak month like: May, June or October give yourself 9-12 months to ensure site and vendor availability.

After setting your planning time line, you’re ready to create your planning checklists.  You may put these in either monthly or weekly format. This list should include all of your planning tasks broken down by due date. These “to-do” lists can be in either list or calendar format.  It can be helpful to also include reminders of task due dates on your checklist.

You may not have thought of a budget as a list but it is exactly that: a prioritized and categorized list of all spending areas for your event.  The budget can be as detailed as you like but a basic budget should include at minimum: budgeted and percentage columns.  I like to include actual and difference columns as well.  The best result is a balance budget that doesn’t exceed 100%.

You can’t have a party without guests so creating a guest list is essential.  Your guest count will affect every aspect of your budget.  Organizing your guest list can be simplified if you have all parties put their lists into two categories: must invite & hope to invite. Compile all ‘must invite’ into one list and the ‘hope to invite’ into a second list.  Essentially your creating an “A-list” and a “B-list.”  Your budget will determine who makes the final guest list.  if you put the guest list into a spreadsheet from the beginning it makes it easier to track rsvp’s and to create table assigments later.

It may seem like a lot of work putting together these lists.  But you’ll be glad that you did as you move ahead in the planning process. Make sure to keep your lists updated and you’ll see that your are staying on schedule and less stressed.  It feels great to mark items off those lists knowing that you that much closer to your wedding day.

Other lists to consider to keep you on track while planning your wedding:

• Vendor criteria & questions
• Vendor contacts & payment list
• Family to-do lists
• Bridal party to-do lists
• Photography list
• Music list
• Table assignments
• Wedding week itinerary (includes ceremony & reception time line)
• Wedding day inventory list (list of decor & personal items for day of)

The biggest wedding decision you’ll make (other than picking the guy) is selecting the locations for your wedding & reception.  The venue sets the scene for every other aspect of your wedding, so it’s important to know all of the factors to consider when choosing your venue.

You probably have an image in your head of what your wedding location may look like and that’s a good place to start.  But the first decision to make is whether or not your ceremony and reception will occur in the same location.  If not, then you must consider how large a geographic radius you want to search for your two venues.  It’s best to keep your distance between locations as short as possible.

Be prepared when you begin researching venues.  It’s best to have a wedding date and guest count in mind before beginning the big search.  The first questions you’ll be asked are what is your wedding date and how many guests are you planning.  The type of reception meal that you are planning also plays a role in size of venue.  A seated dinner for 150 requires more space than an hor’ douerves reception.  Keep the venue size proportionate to your guest list.  If a venue is way too big then your event will be drawfed by the large space.  More importantly, don’t try to cram too many people in a small area.  Keep in mind your other space needs like: dancing, cake display, dj/band, buffet, etc.

Budget obviously can be a make or break factor in selecting your venue.  Plan for the reception (including site fee, food & beverage) to account for about half of your total wedding budget.  So, if a location far exceeds that percentage, keep looking.  Another way a venue can affect your budget is the amount of decor required to achieve your desired look.  If you pick a bare space, keep in mind you’ll spend more money to decorate than a space that has some style of its own.

Flexibility of the venue is also important if you are having both the ceremony and reception in one location.  It’s also crucial if you are planning an outdoor ceremony or reception.  There must be a back up facility in case of inclement weather.  And, a tent alone is not enough of a back up plan.  Please don’t book a venue on a wish and a prayer that the weather will be perfect. So, the goal is to hope for the best but plan for the worst.

Once you’ve established your criteria, selecting the venue should become much easier.  If you do not have a particular type of venue in mind from the beginning, then browse the numerous directories online to see what category of venue strikes your fancy.  Just a few of the venue possibilities to consider are:

Religious,  Historic,  Gardens,  Hotel,  Private Club,  Event Ballroom,  Restaurant,  Museum/Library/Arts,  Resort,  Inn/B&B,  Vineyard,  Equestrian,  Academic,  Arena/Stadium,  Public Park,  Riverfront,   Beach

After you’ve browsed the facilities online and narrowed down your prospects, it’s best to call and schedule an appointment for a tour.  When viewing venues, check out their bridal books & photos so that you see what real weddings in the space can look like.

Choosing your venue is important but it can also be quite fun if you establish your criteria ahead of time and prepare for your appointments.  Just remember, your wedding is what you make it!

Asking how long a vendor has been in business is not going to tell you enough about the longevity of the vendor.  Some vendors may consider themselves “in business” when they were actually a hobbyist.  The proper question is how long have they been licensed and paid for their work in this business.

It’s also important to know how and when they started the business.  Many “recession businesses” have emerged in the wedding industry.  Being the family photographer or party planner doesn’t give them the experience or knowledge to be a professional.  It’s great to seize opportunities to become an entrepreneur but you need to know if the vendor has the background to back it up.

What educational study does the vendor have related to their business – degrees, courses, seminars, conferences? Even naturally gifted people need instruction to cultivate and expand their knowledge.  Professionals are constantly striving to gain knowledge in their field.  And, do not accept at face value the fact that someone is a “certified” professional.  Anyone can go online spend a few hours, receive a certificate and call themselves certified.  That doesn’t make them a professional.  Professionalism comes from experience, education, quality & respect among peers and former clients.

In addition to asking for client references, ask what vendors they work with regularly and call them as well.  Reputation among peers is important.

Ask each vendor if they are a member of any professional organizations?  If so, find out which ones and then research the organization later to see for yourself if it appears to be a professional organization or just a group of people in the same profession.

Is this their full-time job?  If not, a red flag should go up warning that this may be a hobbyist.

How many events do they book per day, weekend and month is another great question.  Do you want a vendor whose attention may be divided among many other events on your wedding day.  Quantity is not an indication of a great vendor.  Quality is found in those who don’t spread themselves too thin.  If you contact a vendor and they do not respond promptly.  Make them off of your list.  If they are too busy for you, you don’t want them.

Beware of vendors who try to be everything to everyone.  Being a jack of all trades and a master of nothing is not a benefit to you.  Choose vendors who focus on being and providing the best not the most.

Ask for a copy of the vendor’s contract.  They should detail in print their pricing and the details of their services & products that will be provided to you.  Review the contract and ask about anything that you aren’t sure about.  Verify the date & time for your event on the contract.  It’s easy to overlook important details.  If there were an error on the contract and you signed it.  You have no recourse on your wedding day if they are a no-show.

Listen to your gut, if someone seems perfect on paper but you just don’t feel comfortable with them, keep looking.  Humans are the only mammals who ignore their instincts.  No matter how silly it may seem, the choice is yours.  There are plenty of quality vendors to choose from, there will be one that is a good fit for you.

Researching, qualifying, interviewing and choosing vendors is time-intensive and can be overwhelming.  But if you don’t put in the time & effort, your dream team can become a nightmare.

But, before you send out those save the dates, make sure you’ve considered all the relevant factors.  Use this checklist to help ensure your wedding day is smooth.

• Weather- typical temperatures & precipitation for wedding city
• Budget (if money is tight, off-season/off day will help)
• Wedding party & family availability
• Significant dates (anniversaries, unique dates)
• Sunrise & sunset times, daylight savings time, lunar phase-will affect photography
• Sporting events (regional & national)
• Holidays (affect so many factors)
• Conventions (affects hotel availability/price, traffic & parking)
• Traffic/road construction for the area around your desired venue
• Community events (road races, festivals)
• Honeymoon site (is it hurricane season, peak season)
• Length of planning time (too short a planning time means many great vendors will already be booked)

]]> http://amyvanmeter.wordpress.com/2010/02/03/fairytales-can-come-true/feed/ 0 Amy VanMeter http://amyvanmeter.wordpress.com/2010/02/03/top-5-advantages-to-a-cold-hard-winter/ http://amyvanmeter.wordpress.com/2010/02/03/top-5-advantages-to-a-cold-hard-winter/#comments Wed, 03 Feb 2010 02:49:26 +0000 Amy VanMeter Events http://amyvanmeter.wordpress.com/?p=256 ]]> No matter where you live, it has been and continues to be, a cold hard winter.  Unlike any in recent memory, and much to the dismay of the global warming groups, this winter has been harsh.  And, according to Punxsutawney Phil, it ain’t over by a long shot.  It seems quite symbolic of our current economy.  We’re in a cold dark place, looking for the a glimmer of light.  Whoa — before I drag you down into the depths of despair, let me say that there is hope — an upside.  As there should be.

Well, if you’re in the snow plow business — you’re staying busy.  If you enjoy arctic temperatures and blustery winds, this is your season.  But if you are tired of the gray skies, pale skin and the wind-blown look, I have great news for you.  And it comes in the form of a Top 5 List.

The Top 5 Advantages to a Cold, Hard Winter

5)  You have a good excuse for putting on a little winter weight

4)  It’s great weather for some major canoodling (but beware of #3)

3)  A baby boom is coming in the Fall (September-November)

2)  Spring will come (along with the Wedding Season) and it will seem like the most beautiful spring ever

And the Number 1 Advantage to a Cold, Hard Winter is …

1)  We’re all getting a lot of time in on our blogging and social networking (which is great for business but not so much for #4)

If that’s not enough to cheer you up and Spring seems too far away, there’s always Cayman.

Happy Blogging!

With that in mind, my advice to wedding industry professionals is to be informed, plan ahead and stay in front of the bride in every way possible.  In order to do that you have to do a little research.

Many small business owners don’t use a marketing plan, probably because they don’t know how.  But a basic plan can be simple and a very valuable tool.  The gist of a marketing plan is to define your target customer and decide how and when you will market to them.  One of the most important aspects to a marketing plan is knowing what works for you and what doesn’t.  You have to know how customers found you – so ask and keep track.   Part of the tracking process should also include an evaluation of some kind from the client.  Ask for their comments and referrals.

Essential elements to a successful low-cost marketing plan in 2010:

• Network, network, network — it’s the best business builder. Advertising budgets have no doubt been shrunken down to bare bones but ask other vendors  what is working for them.
• Get listed on the numerous free directories online.  Yes, they are crowded with vendors but the more frequently a potential customer sees your name, the more likely they are to call you.
• Another given, is social media.  As much as we may be tired of hearing about Facebook, Twitter and the like — they work.
• Also key is being innovative with your service offerings.  That doesn’t mean giving away your services.  But do get creative — look at what brides are doing and want and find a way to fulfill their needs.  If many potential clients can’t afford your usual services, find a way to pare down your offerings to reduce your cost (without sacrificing quality, of course.)
• PR is free — many businesses undervalue public relations in the marketing plans.  That may be because they don’t know how or what it is exactly but the internet has lots of info on how to write and get press releases published.  You only need to invest a little time for a possible great return — getting in front of brides!

Your business’ outlook for 2010 can be sunny if you are willing to make an adequate investment of time.  Brides are looking to hire — will you be the one?

I enjoy using technology if it works in a logical & productive way.  But I have no desire to learn html, xml or any other computer abbreviation or code.

Out of necessity (meaning I had no funds to pay someone to do it) I’ve always created and maintained my own website.  Not because I wanted to or because I enjoy it.  To illustrate the lack of funds point — up to this point I’ve been using MS Frontpage 2000.  No, I’m not kidding.  It’s been almost adequate, albeit limiting and frustrating.  It has lots of hiccups but I’ve learned to deal and accept its limitations.

I decided, after  the big move, that the website redesign had to be done but Frontpage was just not cutting it anymore.  I thought about buying a flash site, after all they are very inexpensive.  But, upon further research, I discovered that search engines aren’t keen on flash and the company I was looking to purchase from doesn’t have the best service reputation.  So, I put it off.   I even researched web design software and have settled on Web Expression (Frontpage’s replacement.)  For whatever reason, I’ve been hesitant to shell out the bucks and just do it.  I didn’t have any problem plopping down the dough to buy a two iphones and the plans that goes along with them.  But, hey, that’s a fun purchase.

So, finally, I decided this is the week.  I designated today to begin the dreaded task of attempting the redesign (with Frontpage, nonetheless.)  So I spent all day researching keywords and looking at free website backgrounds and templates.  I found a free template that I thought just might work.  The problems arose when I tried to apply the css (cascading style sheet for those not in the know.)  Now, I know nothing about css or how to do it, even in Frontpage.  But I was managing pretty well until the hiccups in Frontpage became more frequent and I gave up in frustration.   Thus, I spent the entire day working on it and all I have to show for it is a somewhat finished home page, a sore neck and the loss of half my eyesight (and it wasn’t the best to begin with.)

So, guess what I’ll be doing tomorrow.  I can promise you that it won’t be sitting at the computer wasting any more of my time in Frontpage.  Determination, or in this case stubbornness, can be a good trait but it wasn’t this time.  Lesson learned – next time I’ll spend a little money to save myself the time and frustration (I hope.)

P.S. – The new web design software is supposed to be really great.  But we’ll see how user-friendly it is for a novice like me.  I may still be writing about my website a month from now.  Sure hope not, or you might find me in a looney bin spouting web code.